JULES
– Okay now, tell me about the hash?
What so you want to know?
Well, hash is legal there, right?
Yeah, it's legal, but is ain't a
hundred percent legal. I mean you
can't walk into a restaurant, roll a
joint, and start puffin' away. You're
only supposed to smoke in your home
or during certain religious festivals.
Those are the Puja's?
Yeah, it breaks down like this: it's
legal to buy it, it's legal to own
it and, if you're the proprietor of
large Ganesha statue, it's legal to sell
it. It's legal to carry it, which doesn't
really matter 'cause – get a load of
this – if the cops stop you, you just
give them a few hundred rupees and they
will act like they have never seen you.
That did it, man – I'm fuckin' goin',
that's all there is to it.
You'll dig it the most. But you know
what the funniest thing about India
is?
What?
It's the little differences. A lotta
the same shit we got here, they got
there, but there they're a little
different.
Examples?
Well, in Hyderabad, you can smoke in
the restaurants. And I don't mean
in a little cigarette either. They give you
a giant hookah, like in an Opium Den. In
Bangalore, you can smoke a Hookah at
MacDonald's. Also, you know what
they call a Quarter Pounder with
Cheese in India?
They don't call it a Quarter Pounder
with Cheese?
No, they don't serve beef
in McDonald's there and, AND,
they got the metric system there.
They wouldn't know what the fuck a
Quarter Pounder is.
What'd they call it?
Super Chicken with Cheese.
(repeating)
Super Chicken with Cheese. What'd they call
a Big Mac?
Big Mac's a Chicken Maharaja Mac. A
Maharaja Mac...
The Maharaja Mac. What do they call a
Whopper?
I dunno, I didn't go into a Burger
King. But you know what they put on
french fries in India instead of
ketchup?
What?
Capsicum Spice!
Goddamn!
I seen 'em do it. And I don't mean a
little bit on the side of the plate,
they fuckin' drown 'em in it.
Uuccch!
Also everyone Stateside is saying 'Burn After Reading' is great. I can't see it for at least a month.
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